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Even fans of manufactured, lightweight dance-pop may find their patience tried by the predictable, by-the-numbers hash of S Club 7's S Club. Driven by generic production that's one step up from karaoke tracks, the album plays like a cynical scam designed to make the likes of 'N Sync seem as deep as Neil Young. Despite their U.K. pedigree, S Club 7 spend their time mouthing lyrics that often seem to have been translated, badly, into English ("Shake your little feet," "When you're in the darkest corner, all you do is shine your light," not to mention completely clueless exhortations from this clean-cut lot to "ghetto boys" and "player haters" to get on down). If it's indeed to be, as they threaten, "an S Club millennium," prepare for a pretty dismal thousand years. --Rickey Wright