It was on a late summers evening when i decided to leave my family home and spend the rest of my days away in scotland, i had already booked a hotel in Aberdeenshire the previous night by e-mail   I wanted to spend the last days on god's earth alone and in the land of my ancestors, my partner and i had our differences and i can honestly say i had grown apart from her, the love had gone months a go when she decide to have an abortion in the summer of 2006.   I packed my bag and awaited the bus number 75 which would take me to the bus station in my local town from where i would catch a bus supplied by a national company to travel to Aberdeen.   It would be a long journey and i would not arrive til late evening but at least the light stayed for a longer period in scotland because of it's position in the northern hemisphere.   I would take no clothes, no baggage with me as i wouldn't be in need of a change of clothes since i had planned my suicide for the next day.   I had brought two bottles of my favourite whisky and 150 dothiepin pills which should get the job done.   My partner would arrive home to find no note and my mobile phone which i would not take with me so as to not keep in correspondence.   I eventually left my home for the last time and knew in private it would never be missed as it was the most depressing place i had ever lived in.   The morning was misty and there were only a few  passengers on board, the bus soon arrived at the interchange and soon i was on my way after a half hour stop at the coach station.   My whole life seemed to flash in front of me and there was a sense of guilt that i would probably upset a lot of people with my decision to end my life.   My hotel in Aberdeen was a converted lighthouse it was quite close to the coast as one would expect, i had been impressed by it's cultural history stretching back over 200 years.   I had now reached halfway on my journey and was eager to get the job done and calm my nerves with a few shots of whisky before swallowing a few pills.   At last the coach had arrived at my final destination and i stepped outside of the vehicle and made my way to a local taxi rank where i ordered a fare to the said location.   It would take only 10 minutes by car and soon i could see the hotel/lighthouse appear in the far distance, the rain started to fall and i got out of the cab and paid the fare.   It was a glorious sight to see this beautiful old listed building  in it's new glory with flowers decorated on all of it's outside windows and acting the part of an old lighthouse with it's make believe beam of light circulating around part of the building.   I checked in and made my way to one of the 5 rooms which had been created by the owners of the lighthouse,each room had a different name on the door which represented a famous local folksman, the room was fairly small as you would expect.   I had paid top dollar to add a mini bar ,fruit basket and en-suite facilities, although i had paid for a weeks accomodation i would only be staying the one night.   I had told the owners that i was a writer and wished not to be disturbed for the duration of my stay, not even a cleaner was allowed in during the morning as i would do my own cleaning having experienced this profession in my past, neither would i be taking breakfast.   Darkness soon arrived and i layed my head to rest, a thousand thoughts passed through my mind as i considered what my partner would be thinking, perhaps she would have to consider making her own tea, not having someone to talk to and losing a soulmate, either way i had no regrets and divorce would be too good for her.   It was just after 10 pm and i began to take my whisky and pills slowly, the job would take at least an hour, i decided  to ease my way in to the task in hand, i ran a bath and began to slowly relax.   I would stay in the bath for at least half an hour then complete my task which would end my life, i slowly began to lose consciousness and drifted in to a mild coma, my vision was then from a regressive state and i began to see familiar faces from my past childhood, people who must have passed over to the other side and the later years of my life.   Suddenly there then began what seemed to be a tug of war between life and death and after this occured everything just went BLACK, i had fallen in to nothingness a land of limbo where it appaear dark all the time and i wasn't even conscious of my own existence, just sillence, the job had been done i had finally ended my life.THE END.